I had a discussion on my tumblr inbox today with another tumblr user. During this discussion I said something that rings very true. It was during a discussion on how we as human beings tend to miss the beautiful aspects of ourselves.
I to am guilty of doing so. I find myself doing it all the time. My insecurity with my looks or personality. Time in/out again and again I am told my views upon myself are wrong. Yet we sit in closed rooms and think simply these people looking in are simply insane.
Basically what I am saying here is it is always easier to give the advice in which we should follow ourselves. And sadly we seem more willing of this advice when it comes from strangers. Only to later down the road repeat the neglect of which we seek. The confirming acknowledgement of who we are.
As humans we strive of compliments and attention. We will destroy someone just to feel better. And once we succeed in destroying that person we will be there to fix the insecurity in which we created. Why? To help mend the issues of insecurity of which we bred inside of us. Its sad and yet a beautiful ability that we all can do without a second thought.
I am guilty of these insecure feelings. For example my biggest issue is if I put on weight. Such as I have lately. Not a massive amount. Just a small, what others around me call normal, amount of stomach weight. I am always fluxing in my size. But I have always been a comfortable size 5-7. Lately that size has been to a 10-12. And this causes me to panic with myself. So I change how I eat. Become down upon myself again. Sometimes I forget to eat. Nothing I do changes from the type of foods I eat to my exercise. I don't eat bad and I walk everywhere I go if not on bus. Lately this insecurity causes me to sleep. And that consumes me. Sleep. I can lay in blissful coma for hours on end. Sleep is where I am most comfortable with myself. I am not judged in my sleep. I do not judge me in sleep. I am blank and empty.
So I guess what I am saying here is we can all become lost in these feelings. We can only hope to get "better" in time. But the bigger question is do we ever truly get "better" and does that even exist in today's society??
"Its all we really can hope for. To get better. I'm starting to feel that its human instinct to tear yourself apart bit by bit and forget about the good bits that are what create us. Only left to feel odd and out of place once we put ourselves together again." -PghStitches
As I wrote these words I realize the truth in it. Our personality, our physical characteristics, our existence. It is all like a giant jigsaw puzzle, or even a work of art one might say. We, being our biggest critics, begin to second guess if we are putting it together correct or not. So we start to skip or over look important parts. And all we are left with when we are done is a collapsing structure in which we don't know.
I to am guilty of doing so. I find myself doing it all the time. My insecurity with my looks or personality. Time in/out again and again I am told my views upon myself are wrong. Yet we sit in closed rooms and think simply these people looking in are simply insane.
Basically what I am saying here is it is always easier to give the advice in which we should follow ourselves. And sadly we seem more willing of this advice when it comes from strangers. Only to later down the road repeat the neglect of which we seek. The confirming acknowledgement of who we are.
As humans we strive of compliments and attention. We will destroy someone just to feel better. And once we succeed in destroying that person we will be there to fix the insecurity in which we created. Why? To help mend the issues of insecurity of which we bred inside of us. Its sad and yet a beautiful ability that we all can do without a second thought.
I am guilty of these insecure feelings. For example my biggest issue is if I put on weight. Such as I have lately. Not a massive amount. Just a small, what others around me call normal, amount of stomach weight. I am always fluxing in my size. But I have always been a comfortable size 5-7. Lately that size has been to a 10-12. And this causes me to panic with myself. So I change how I eat. Become down upon myself again. Sometimes I forget to eat. Nothing I do changes from the type of foods I eat to my exercise. I don't eat bad and I walk everywhere I go if not on bus. Lately this insecurity causes me to sleep. And that consumes me. Sleep. I can lay in blissful coma for hours on end. Sleep is where I am most comfortable with myself. I am not judged in my sleep. I do not judge me in sleep. I am blank and empty.
So I guess what I am saying here is we can all become lost in these feelings. We can only hope to get "better" in time. But the bigger question is do we ever truly get "better" and does that even exist in today's society??
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